Sunday Scaries

My friend Nicole has aptly titled what I am feeling today as the "Sunday Scaries"...when you realize you have to work in (UGH) 17 hours and time just seems to warp by.  For me, days like this (after a night out at a friends) are pretty laden with anxiety, especially given the turn the night took.  It was uncomfortable but above all, it was sad.  And, its raining.

Today, I am bummed.

One Year Ago

We're coming up on the time one year ago that I found out I was pregnant (and a few weeks later, when I met with Dr. Moses to discover that I no longer was).  I am still in the process of fully understanding my grief over a baby that I barely had begun to know but loved so deeply, but over the past few weeks I've noticed a new trend of articles popping up on the internet...ones that suggest that maybe not sharing being pregnant right away isn't a great idea, because it makes one feel guilty or silly about a pregnancy that (as my former primary physician said) was "never meant to happen". 

I came across this article today and found it incredibly validating.  I too have questioned whether or not I want to have kids and worry about what it will be like when I do find out I am pregnant again...will I be able to have the excitement that I first had, or will my first several weeks be clouded with fear.  I can't predict the future but this article helped.

How My Miscarriage Changed My Next Pregnancy